How Unexpectedly Amusing

Goodness my experiences with the opposite sex never cease to amuse me.

While I don't have any potential suitors on the horizon, a former suitor has made his way back into my life. The last guy I dated has decided he wants to be my friend again. And I seem to be agreeing. Don't get me wrong, he was a horrible boyfriend, but he is a good guy. We just weren't suited to each other. He's still the self absorbed, arrogant person he was before, but now that we aren't dating I don't care! He can be as big a jerk as he wants to be, he's not my problem anymore. I can get mad at him and not have to worry how it will effect 'us'. His opinion matters nothing to me. I look at him, and I don't feel anything romantic. He's just him.

Now all that explanation aside, you might be wondering how the devil this all came about.

It all started when I needed to use someone.

I had a final last semester at 8 AM. And I might be many things, but a morning person I am not nor shall I ever be. So as you have probably guessed, I was hardly delighted with the thought of waking up at 6, to be leaving the house by 7, to make the 30 minute drive to campus for the exam. And since a group of students from the class had decided to meet up the night before on campus to study, and I had two papers to finish that same night, I knew that going home would just mean distractions and sleeping. Two things I did NOT have time for.

I was seriously considering just camping out in a library on campus, but considering how easy it would have been for one of the hundreds of jerks on campus to come along and pilfer my belongings once I inevitably nodded off, I decided against that.

I had no other choice. I simply didn't feel safe staying either in the library or in my car, so I took a breath and messaged him on facebook. I'm not too proud to say I begged. I was desperate. But he was fine with it off the bat, no excessive pleading or bribery necessary. 

I was nervous but to desperate to make a big fuss. I hadn't spoken with him beyond the odd text here and there since the afternoon we broke up. I kept thinking we wouldn't be able to talk, that it would be all bizarre. I waited for him to pick me up and take me to his apartment on campus with a million doubts in my head. This was weird, this was a bad idea, what if I'm not as over him as I'm so certain I am? What if he isn't over me? What if he tries something? Is this a bad idea?

But the time his truck pulled up, I was in something of a state. But I knew myself. So I took a breath, put on a smile, and refused to let any weirdness overwhelm me.

I should never have doubted either of us. It was as if we had never stopped being friends. We talked for HOURS. Literally. Non-stop talking and joking back and forth. We filled each other in on our lives and how much we both hated our University. We even talked about our brief dating fling and how much of a mistake it was. Talking and spending time with him was so easy and comfortable. But the best part of the whole time was realizing that I felt absolutely nothing for him! He was simply who he was, my friend. Nothing more. I had told my friends the night before where i would be staying, and they (understandably) freaked out. What, they insisted, was I going to do If he still liked me or had feelings for me? My reply was simple: I would do nothing, I have no feelings for him nor any desire to fall back into his arms, thus his feelings are irrelevant and have no bearing on my decision. (If you were wondering yes I do talk like this in everyday life. I'm quite pompous.) But you cannot imagine my relief when I realized just how true that was. We are friends. Good friends I'd even go so far as to say. But that is all we will ever be.


So while some of you might be rolling your eyes at my firm declarations, let me assure you with one last story. After my crashing at his place at the end of the fall semester, we had begun texting back and forth and decided to meet up once the spring semester started up. So the first day back to class we go out to lunch together. (Side note, a little old busybody lady from church saw us at Subway. Yes things like that do happen in real life.) He began gearing up to ask me a question, flattering me and telling me what a great person I was, so pretty and smart and nice. I'll admit, I had a horrible moment of 'Oh noes, he's going to ask me out...I wonder if I would live if I jumped out of a moving vehicle'. NOPE! He wanted me to set him up with a girl who had a class with me last semester. Cue huge sigh of relief! So while we are not interested in each other, we do use each other, for relationship advice in my case, and to meet females in his case. So until he begins to annoy me too much to bear, we are friends.

I'm teaching him to tango on Wednesday.