Holy frik this took me ages to write!
That's what I get for trying to be loquacious.
And for going so long without a proper update on my life.
Blogger FAIL.
She was a breathtakingly beautiful bride, and he was a wonderfully besotted groom.
I love them both so much and am so very happy they met and are starting a life together.
But this story does not START with a wedding! The wedding is only a PART of the story I have for you all! So, lets get started!
My dear ones got married in Virgina Beach, and, since I do not live there I had to fly in on May 4th. I was lucky enough to be staying with the bride and her family (mother, father, brother, aunt, uncle, cousin/photographer, grandmother) in their rented beach house. And when I say 'beach house', I mean BEACH HOUSE. I literally woke up every morning and saw the ocean from my mattress.I got this photo the day of the wedding after my first of three walks on the beach. See those toes in the bottom of the frame? Yeah that's me! Closest thing to a self portrait I've posted!
Could get used to a view like this!
Now, the lovely bride was a bit frazzled on that first day, what with her impending nuptials and family dramaz. Being my sunny and helpful self, I did everything I could to soothe nerves and tempers as the brides aunt did her best to give my friend a nervous breakdown. The aunt was an unending fount of criticism, crude humor, and dissent at a time when the family ought to have been rejoicing. The first day and a half I was there were tense to say the least! But by noon on the second day, after a massive row between her aunt and father, the aunt from heck left. The bride, a bridesmaid and I had holed up in our room and left them to their quarrel. We were doing our best to keep the bride calm and find a replacement photographer in case her cousin left (He didn't end up leaving, thank God! I didn't want to have to take photos if he'd left!). The bridesmaid and I casually walked upstairs to figure out what was going on, and to our delight, the aunt was leaving! We delivered the news to the bride anxiously waiting downstairs. The bridesmaid was nice, when the bride expressed disbelief I piped up with 'Ding dong the witch is dead, babe'. I deliver news so well! From that moment on the wedding became fun. We laughed, relaxed, and enjoyed our time together.
For some quick clarification, I knew the bride, groom, and only one of the guests vaguely. But within minutes of meeting the bridal party and guests that stayed with us at the beach house, I was everybody's friend! I was exhausted but buzzed with excitement so I wasn't half as shy as I normally would have been. I called myself the 'spare bridesmaid' and had a grand old time just getting to kick back and relax during things like the rehearsal, photo times and ceremony. But for as much as I was enjoying meeting new people and making new friends, there was an unexpected part of being a fish out of water...with lots of other fish all out of our own waters....
I got lost. A LOT.
Lest see, the first time we got lost was on the way from the rehearsal itself to the rehearsal dinner. I was put in the car with two bridesmaids (one who had driven in from NYC just a few hours earlier), and the brides brother. It was perhaps a ten minute drive from the venue to the restaurant. Welllll....we made a wrong turn. Lets have a quick geography review: Virginia is right below Maryland, and the coasts of the two states are connected via a bridge. Its a very LONG bridge, I think my friend said its about an hour commute...I dunno, I didn't really pay attention. Why would I have listened?! It wasn't like I'd NEED that knowledge for anything! I'm sure you all see where this is leading to...
We made a wrong turn. Onto the bridge. With less then a quarter tank of gas in the car. I was pretty sure at that moment we were going to Maryland. Or going to die stranded on the bridge. But don't worry, this story has a happy ending! I DIDN'T DIE! The bridge was entirely empty, so we were able to execute an entirely illegal U-turn IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BRIDGE! Go team us! So we ended up getting to the dinner right on time tra la la la. But don't go thinking that was the last time the car I was in got lost! Oh no, the fun was just getting started!
My next unplanned adventure was less 'ZOMG WE'RE DRIVING TO A DIFFERENT STATE' and more 'oh goodness this is silly'. It was the day of the wedding and me and a bridesmaid were running some lunch to the bride waiting at some hair salon. We couldn't find it. The salon was in the corner of one plaza, and shouldn't have been difficult to find. Except for the plaza we were looking for was in plaza-opolis. SO MANY PLAZAS! Of course the only person we say to get directions from was another person from out of state! But we did find it, so this mini-adventure was of far shorter duration, the bride was fed and we puttered back to the Beach House to pretty up for the wedding that afternoon.
Earlier that morning, three of the brides friends had driven in for the ceremony. I had vaguely met one of the guys before (Wedding Boy), and had heard about the other guy (British Boy). The girl they were with was a mystery (Blondie). I was driven to the ceremony by Wedding Boy and the brides brother. After my usual thirty seconds of shyness, Wedding Boy was already talking about he and I hanging out when we got back home. I'm beginning to realize, I'm very charming.
Then came the ceremony. Seeing two people so in love is always beautiful to me. Seeing the bride walking down the aisle with her father was enough to get me choked up. I enjoyed the brief time to just sit and enjoy myself and be 'off'. But it wasn't meant to last. I got through the receiving line and was immediately sent off by the bridesmaids to go do this and get this please and put this in the limo. Sigh. OK, back to work I go. Then I realize something: My luggage is still at the Beach House.
At that point I wasn't supposed to go back to the Beach House, I was going to stay in the brides apartment with the bridesmaids and Blondie before my bright and early flight the next morning. Ohhhh snap. Then we all realize that Blondie will need her things too since, again, we hadn't planned on going back to the house! As we're figuring out who needs to stay for pictures and who can take me and Blondie back for our things, we have another epiphany. The church the service was held at is not where the reception will be, we're all supposed to go to a hall on a Military Base (The grooms father served in the Navy). So without a street name, address, or really good idea of where to go, Wedding Boy, British Boy, Blondie and I had to find SOMEONE who could give us directions to the base from the Beach House.
I got lost. A LOT.
Lest see, the first time we got lost was on the way from the rehearsal itself to the rehearsal dinner. I was put in the car with two bridesmaids (one who had driven in from NYC just a few hours earlier), and the brides brother. It was perhaps a ten minute drive from the venue to the restaurant. Welllll....we made a wrong turn. Lets have a quick geography review: Virginia is right below Maryland, and the coasts of the two states are connected via a bridge. Its a very LONG bridge, I think my friend said its about an hour commute...I dunno, I didn't really pay attention. Why would I have listened?! It wasn't like I'd NEED that knowledge for anything! I'm sure you all see where this is leading to...
We made a wrong turn. Onto the bridge. With less then a quarter tank of gas in the car. I was pretty sure at that moment we were going to Maryland. Or going to die stranded on the bridge. But don't worry, this story has a happy ending! I DIDN'T DIE! The bridge was entirely empty, so we were able to execute an entirely illegal U-turn IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BRIDGE! Go team us! So we ended up getting to the dinner right on time tra la la la. But don't go thinking that was the last time the car I was in got lost! Oh no, the fun was just getting started!
My next unplanned adventure was less 'ZOMG WE'RE DRIVING TO A DIFFERENT STATE' and more 'oh goodness this is silly'. It was the day of the wedding and me and a bridesmaid were running some lunch to the bride waiting at some hair salon. We couldn't find it. The salon was in the corner of one plaza, and shouldn't have been difficult to find. Except for the plaza we were looking for was in plaza-opolis. SO MANY PLAZAS! Of course the only person we say to get directions from was another person from out of state! But we did find it, so this mini-adventure was of far shorter duration, the bride was fed and we puttered back to the Beach House to pretty up for the wedding that afternoon.
Earlier that morning, three of the brides friends had driven in for the ceremony. I had vaguely met one of the guys before (Wedding Boy), and had heard about the other guy (British Boy). The girl they were with was a mystery (Blondie). I was driven to the ceremony by Wedding Boy and the brides brother. After my usual thirty seconds of shyness, Wedding Boy was already talking about he and I hanging out when we got back home. I'm beginning to realize, I'm very charming.
Then came the ceremony. Seeing two people so in love is always beautiful to me. Seeing the bride walking down the aisle with her father was enough to get me choked up. I enjoyed the brief time to just sit and enjoy myself and be 'off'. But it wasn't meant to last. I got through the receiving line and was immediately sent off by the bridesmaids to go do this and get this please and put this in the limo. Sigh. OK, back to work I go. Then I realize something: My luggage is still at the Beach House.
At that point I wasn't supposed to go back to the Beach House, I was going to stay in the brides apartment with the bridesmaids and Blondie before my bright and early flight the next morning. Ohhhh snap. Then we all realize that Blondie will need her things too since, again, we hadn't planned on going back to the house! As we're figuring out who needs to stay for pictures and who can take me and Blondie back for our things, we have another epiphany. The church the service was held at is not where the reception will be, we're all supposed to go to a hall on a Military Base (The grooms father served in the Navy). So without a street name, address, or really good idea of where to go, Wedding Boy, British Boy, Blondie and I had to find SOMEONE who could give us directions to the base from the Beach House.
Man alive this is a long post.
After going in and out and up and down and over and under, we kinda sorta get directions. So its back into the car for the next leg of the adventure! Wedding Boy gets us back to the Beach Hose safely and Blondie and I cram our luggage into the car. Wedding Boy and British Boy had been tinkering with the GPS and thought they had the right address and directions to the reception. According to the GPS, it was only....five minutes away....I already knew this was wrong. There was no way the main entrance to a MILITARY BASE would be smack in the middle of such a residential area. But I figured we'd end up somewhere so I kept my very tired mouth shut.
I was right. But so was the GPS. There was a gate to the base, but it was closed, and there was no one around to open it for us. I joked that was the gate where they let out the terrorists who were apologetic and wanted to integrate into normal society. With that, it was back to the side of the road to fiddle with the GPS. After a few minutes, Wedding Boy finally got the right directions and (once AGAIN) we were on the road! The four of us were all relaxed and joking, British Boy and Blondie began discussing their own upcoming wedding, so Wedding Boy and I were left to our own conversation. After a few minutes of glancing from the GPS screen to the road, and me chiding him to keep his eyes on the road since I really didn't want to die, he tossed the GPS over to me.
'Here, could you read off the directions?'
'Sure, *in GPS voice* in-400-yards-make-a-right-turn'
To clarify, I have a freakin' AWESOME GPS voice. Its robotic, distant, and kinda a bit hot, if I do say so myself. He laughed and told me he liked my voice much better then the voice on the GPS. Oh yeah, I blushed. He said if the whole sign lanuge thing didn't work out as a job I could be the voice of the GPS. Smitten? Why, yes I was.
I'm happy to say we did finally make it to the reception not long after that exchange. Oh what a night! The bride and groom danced to Michael Buble's 'For Once in My Life', and once they were done, it was time to hit the dance floor, and hit it I did. The bridesmaids swept me along with them in the first round of dancing and form that point forward I wasn't off the floor for longer then two songs together. I think I danced for three hours in 3.5 inch wedges...does that qualify me for some kind of medal? Sadly, Wedding Boy was too tired to dance, so I wiggled and shimmied with the bridesmaids all night.
Right as I'm about to drop with exhaustion, its time to say goodbye to the newlyweds and pack up the cars. I'm pulling some strangers over to take loads of gifts and bridesmaids back to the Beach House (Yeah we went back so yes that whole post-ceremony trip WAS for naught) and I pile BACK in the car with Wedding Boy, British Boy and Blondie. British Boy and Blondie were asleep in the back seat within minutes, so it was just me left to keep Wedding Boy awake for the drive. British Boy asked as we pulled out of the parking lot if he'd need the GPS back on, or if Wedding Boy was going to trust my vague recollections of where we were to get us back. With a smile, he said, 'I don't need the GPS, I have my Mackaboo'. Except he didn't say Mackboo of course, he said my name. So very smitten I was. We talked about a favotie TV show of mine, Doctor Who. A guest at the wedding had told him he looked like a character from the show, so he was asking about that and pretty strongly hinting that we should watch it together. Naturally, getting ANYONE into Doctor Who is exciting for me, but the thought of getting to see him again made it more so.
The drive was too short this time, its amazing how quickly you can get somewhere when you don't get lost! With final hugs to Blondie, British Boy (Who was such a gem, carrying my suitcase up the stairs whenever I asked), and Wedding Boy, I went off to bed to catch a few hours sleep before my flight at 7 AM. Not hard to guess what I dreamed of that final night in Virgina Beach....yep, dolphins!
So, that was the wedding. The trip home was not nearly as exciting as the trip itself. Recall, the wedding was hte beginning of MAY. It's now the beginning of JULY. Since the trip, I've hung out with one of the bridesmaids once and had a grand old time. I've seen Wedding Boy.....wait, no I haven't....blargh. We're friends on facebook, but I don't know if I'm supposed to wait for him to make a move or something....
But no matter what happen with Wedding Boy, my dear friends are now married! And now I have another place to consider moving to when I graduate college. Hmmmm.......
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